Stay with Me
by thewr1ter
Summary: "This is not a love story but it is a story about love." A frenzied one-night-stand between NYPD's top two detectives reveals new feelings between them. Will Olivia decide to run or will she decide to cope, handle, and understand her feelings. (I'm not over-loading it with smut. yet.) Reviews and suggestions are appreciated.
1. Stay with Me

Stay with me

A/N: Song title is encouraged by Sam Smith. The lyrics are by Sam Smiths.

I do not own the main characters. The male animal genitalia Dick Wolf does.

1-6 Precinct 12:47 a.m.

Today had been a long day for the detectives. A handful of different cases had come in at once. They were working in overdrive all day. Detective Olivia Benson and Detective Nick Amaro were the only ones left in the precinct with the exception of their captain Don Cragen. Olivia worked as gracefully and as quickly as a worker bee, while on the other hand her partner Nick was struggling. His attention was not on the correct subject that night. His mind kept drifting off to that one fateful night with Olivia. He found himself staring at her on more than a few occasions. Then Cragen's office door opened.

"I'm about to go home, you two should do the same. The paper work will always be here tomorrow." He dryly stated.

"Okay" Olivia said with exhaustion filling her voice. Nick simply nodded.

Once He was sure that Cragen left, he decided that now was close to the right time to talk about this. Well as close as she let him. Nick decided that he would prepare himself for harsh and cold comments. As he knew that she didn't mean them.

"Liv, we need to talk about this, and I don't want you running from this. It has been almost 3 weeks since you have looked me in the eye" He grimly stated.

Olivia looked as if she would sprint out of here, if she could. "Not tonight nick, I do not want to talk about it."

"Why?" He questioned. Nick knew she wouldn't have a reasonable answer, so he decided he would push his luck. "Why won't you accept that we both know that we want more out of this? Why won't you let me love you? Because I know you, and I know that you have been thinking about that day as much as I have."

_Flashback_

"_Liv, let me help you, you are fumbling with my keys." He chuckled_

"_I see you find this funny, you ass." She said as she handed him his keys defeatedly. She watched as he slid the key into the slot and gently pushed the door open. _

_He let her walk in first, and watch her maneuver around this familiar place he calls his home; admiring her as she leans against the counter with a water glass in her hand, and the kitchen light illuminating her. He walks in and stands right in front of her- tossing personal space out the window. _

_She puts her glass on the counter, about to protest. He inches closer to her- close enough to hear her breath hitch- he leans down, so that his lips just graze hers and says, "Do you want to do this Liv?" He didn't receive an answer, (not a direct one). Olivia took the step to claim his lips in a passionate and powerful kiss. Nick responded almost instantly, raising his hand to rake his finger through her gorgeous brown hair. He slightly shifted his head to deepen the kiss. She moaned into his mouth, and that euphoric sound went straight to 'Nick Jr.' He groaned and lifted her up onto the counter and pressed his groin onto her heated core._

"_Ahh" she let out a strangled moan as she broke the kiss. _

_Nick started to kiss and suckle the column of her neck, as he slowly undid her blouse. Olivia fidgeted with his belt buckle while he worked magic with the sensitive spot on her collarbone. He looked deep into the mocha orbs she calls her eyes and said "Did you know that you are beautiful?" _

_Her face turned soft red and witfully responded "Nick, If I didn't know any better, I would think that you are trying to get in my pants." They both shared a chuckle before his hand moved down to the swell of her breast that is exposed by her choice of a black and red lace bra. She watched him intensely, and was quite confused when he took his hands off of her. But to her surprise he was just trying to figure out where he could move them._

"_I think our party should continue somewhere more comfortable." He picked her up and she locked her ankles on his lower back. He carried her to the bedroom while occasionally bumping a wall._

_Olivia now lies naked in the center of his bed. Nick circles his finger on her inner thigh, dangerously close to where she wants his fingers. She doesn't seem like she can wait so she makes it known. "Nick, why don't we skip the foreplay, I think we already have enough of built tension." _

_He smirked that boyish grin that she loved and it made her knees melt. He crawled toward her and had his throbbing dick aligned with her entrance. She hissed as he penetrated her tight, wet, hot core. "Ahh, shit Liv." He pulled out and pushed back in going a little deeper. After thrusting a few more times he was buried to her hilt. "Oh my god, baby, you have to move." She pleaded. Nick was reaching spots that she did not know that were there._

_After making love, having sex, and fucking like animals multiple times, they lay spent on the bed asleep; neither of them wanting to wake up and deal with the awkwardness. Olivia was the first to awake, so she made the decision for the both of them. She gathered her clothes and grabbed her purse with her gun and badge in it. She decided that they were not going to talk about this day, and she was going to see how did she let this go this far- knowing she had feelings for her partner. _

_This was the last type of contact that she had with Nick outside of work._

_Flashback end_

"Nick not all your thoughts are meant to be said. I don't know why you won't accept that we had an amazing one-night-stand and that is all it will ever be." She said calmly.

**I guess it's true that I'm not good at a one-night-stand**

**But I still need love cause I'm just a man**

**This night never seem to go to plan**

Nick's heart seemed to have shattered, and you could see it on his face. But he quickly changed it to a blank expression. "Really Liv? Then why is bothering you so much. As you say, it's just a one-night-stand. But what you don't seem to understand is that you push away people who even have the _potential _to love you. So I would say fuck it, but I already have. I can't say forget it because I can't. You are stuck in my head like a brain tumor that is spreading throughout my body. But no, you want to be hard, when on the inside you are just as vulnerable as any other person. I would let you live your lonely life. I wish I could just watch you live it from a distance. But I choose break my back every day just to try to resist the urge to kiss you, to hold your hand and even just to hold you in my arms. Liv, you can't just throw yourself at any stranger just to fuck away your problems; especially when you have someone willing to do that." With that he walked over to her desk, and pulled her to stand while taking her hand.

**I don't want you to leave,**

**Will you hold my hand?**

**Oh, won't you stay with me?**

**Cause you're all I need**

Reviews are appreciated! Thanks for reading!


	2. Break Even

Stay with me -Breakeven – Chapter 2

Lyrics are by The Script- Breakeven

Thanks for the reviews, they are appreciated

I do not own the main characters. The male animal genitalia Dick Wolf does.

_With that he walked over to her desk, and pulled her to stand while taking her hand._

_**I don't want you to leave,**_

_**Will you hold my hand?**_

_**Oh, won't you stay with me?**_

'_**Cause you are all I need**_

CONTINUE…

"Nick, what are you doing?"

"I'm trying to make you see how you affect me." He pulled her hand to his chest. "Do you feel that? Do you feel my heart shattering when you deny our love?" Nick then put her hand on her chest, so she can feel her own heartbeat. "What is your heart telling you to do?"

Olivia honestly wasn't sure if wanted to tell Nick how she felt, but her partner was as stubborn as a mule, and his persistence was unbreakable. So she decided to give in. "My brain is screaming at me, telling me to run and never look back, because you are my partner. But my heart is telling me that it is okay to jump off the cliff that is named love." She paused and looked deep into his brown eyes, but broke away knowing she would get lost in them. She took a deep breath.

"You and I both know that this is wrong, that we shouldn't do this; that we shouldn't have done this. The first time was a mistake. It shouldn't have happened, and I think it would be best if we forget that it happened and move on with our lives."

Nick looked as if he was going to cry. He let her hand go, went to his desk, grabbed his things, and left.

**What am I gonna to do,**

**When the best part of me was always you and**

**What am I supposed to say,**

**When I'm all choked up and you're okay**

Olivia was still standing in the same spot after he left. She let out a single tear, not believing that she told him that. She loved him, but love can be risky, devious, deceitful, but it was rare that you find a type of love that is pure. Was Nick really trying to give her pure love? If he was, it doesn't matter now. She pushed him away, like did to so many other men. She grabbed her things and left the precinct, planning on going home and having her a very tall glass of wine.

The next day- Olivia's POV

Nick hasn't shown up to work today and she is starting to worry; hoping that he didn't do anything stupid last night. Her thoughts were interrupted as Captain called me into his office. She walked in, making sure SHE closed the door behind me.

"Liv, is there something I need to know about?" Oh, god, does he know? She doesn't think he does, so she will play it off.

"About what?" She tried to sound as innocent as possible.

"You know damn well what I'm talking about!" Shit. Wait. How does he know?

"We had an argument last night." She just has to broad, not to many details until She is positively sure.

"About what?" Dammit.

"It was personal." she thinks she just made him mad. His face is turning red. He is trying so hard not to yell. Olivia probably needs to sit down.

"Dammit Olivia, stop stonewalling me. I thought that there was something going on between you two, but now Nick has made it clear that there has." He paused and took a deep breath. His face started to soften. "Liv, he turned his papers in and is requesting for a transfer."

Her jaw literately just hit the floor. 'Nick turned his papers in? I did this, I need to fix it'. "Captain, can I go talk to him?" She is struggling to keep her tears at bay as she stand waiting for his approval. He simply nods his head.

Olivia has been calling Nick for the past ten minutes, but every time she is sent to voicemail. Driving to his house seems like a logical answer. So she gets in her car takes that drive, right into 3:00 traffic.

She is caught a yet another red light, "Dammit!" she yells in frustration. On her left there is a diner that police officers go to. As soon as the light turned green, she made a left and turned into the parking lot. She got out her car, grabbed her gun and her badge, she put her purse in the trunk, locked the car, and left. She started walking in the direction of Nick's house.

Nick's POV

**They say bad things happen for a reason**

**But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding**

Nick is sitting on his couch with his gun, a picture of Zara, a picture of him and Olivia, and a bottle of tequila on the coffee table. He is seriously contemplating his options. Whether he drinks enough to pass out, and probably not wake up, or to eat his gun to get it over with. The pictures keep him from doing either but he still can't help but to think about it. His ex-wife took his daughter, his love has permanently broken his heart, and he isn't going to work at his favorite job anymore. He is left sitting with his own thoughts until he hears someone knocking on the door.

"NICK OPEN THE DOOR!" Olivia is screaming at his door, now he is wondering if he should open it or not. She starts to bang on the door.

"It's open." His statement was barely missed by her. The door is slowly opened. All he could hear is her making small footsteps across his floor.

"Nick?"

"In here."

Her eyes almost bucked out of her head when she saw my gun and the tequila on the table. She practically sprinted to grab the gun and alcohol. 'I really hope she leaves soon' He thought. Anger is starting to spread across her face.

"Were you not MAN enough to tell me you were leaving?" Her voice is dripping with anger.

"Were you not WOMAN enough to acknowledge your feelings?" His voice was so calm it was scary.

End of Nick's POV

Olivia was speechless, there wasn't much left to say since she was the reason of him leaving. She walks towards him and sits on the couch and looks at the pictures on the table.

"I remem- " He cut her off.

"Why are you here?" he asks. "Why are you trying to talk to me now that I am leaving? I tried to talk to you yesterday, but it didn't make a difference. Just like now. It won't make a difference."

She had to figure out a way to avoid his question. "Were you going to eat your gun if I didn't come in here?" She asked this with all seriousness.

"To your surprise, no, I haven't even touch it or the liquor since I put it on the table. I couldn't leave my little Zara like that." He picked up her picture and stroked it.

To be honest, her feelings were hurt. He didn't even acknowledge that her picture was still on the table. She was about to say something when he spoke up.

"When are you going to leave? Because it seems that you don't care as much as I would if you were leaving. I would probably be crying right now, but here you are just sitting here; not doing anything. You clearly have moved on since the incident yesterday and a few weeks ago, so I think it would be best if you leave." A single tear rolled down his face, though he was holding back hundreds.

**Cause she's moved on while I'm still grieving**

**And when a heart breaks, no it don't break even **

Olivia stood and straightened herself out and said "I see you have made you decision. Take care of yourself Nick." And with that she walked out of the door.

Thanks for reading.

Reviews are always welcome, and so are suggestions.


	3. Not over You

Stay with Me- Not Over You- Chapter 3

Lyrics are by Gavin DeGraw- Not Over You

Thanks for the reviews! :D

I do not own the main characters. The male animal genitalia Dick Wolf does.

_Olivia stood and straightened herself out and said "I see you have made your decision. Take care of yourself Nick." And with that she walked out of the door._

CONTINUE…

One week later

1-6 Precinct 6:32 a.m.

Olivia has just arrived at the precinct. She looks tired, she has bags under her eyes and her face is sunken in. It seems as if she hasn't slept for days. She plops down in her desk chair with a huff and catches Fin's attention.

"Hey Liv, how you feeling?" He seemed genuinely concerned.

"I'm fine."

"Liv, you looked like you haven't slept in days. I know you feel bad about Nick leaving but-" she interrupted him.

"I said I'm fine Fin!" she snapped at him. Fin appeared offended has he walked away and went to his desk. But deep down he knows how hard this is hitting her; especially since that is her second partner leaving.

**If you ask me how I'm doing**

**I would say I'm doing just fine**

**I would lie and say that you are not on my mind**

For Nick's replacement they sent in a rookie from Brooklyn. Her name was Jamarion Cragen. Her reputation as a uni was very good. They said she was quick on her feet, very focused, and was never in trouble. Today was the day that she met her new partner. The captain already informed her that her partner would most likely be cold to her.

She exited the elevator and walked into the bullpen. Fin was the first to notice her walk in.

"May I help you?"

"Umm, no. I'm Jamarion Cragen, the replacement for Nick Amaro" she said nervously, noticing that the woman that was sitting in a desk was staring at her.

"Oh, Well, it's nice to meet you. I am Odafinn Tutuola, but everyone calls me Fin." He looks confused and glances towards Olivia and sees that she is in a daze so he introduces her. "This is Olivia Benson and my partner Amanda Rollins should be here soon. You should probably let the captain know that you are here."

Then Amanda walked in with a tray of coffees. She sets one on Olivia's desk, taking her out of her daze. "Here she is, this is Amanda."

"Uh, Hey, yeah I'm Amanda and you are?

"I'm Jamarion Cragen. It's nice to meet you." Amanda looked just as confused as Fin did.

"Do you have any relation to the captain?"

"Not that I know of. But let me go and tell the captain that I'm here." With that she walked into his office.

1-6 Precinct 1:28 p.m.

No new cases have come in since this morning. Jamarion heard her stomach growl and she had an idea of how she can get to know her new partner.

"Hey Olivia, would you like to go and grab lunch?"

This question caught Olivia off guard, her head snapped up and she looked at Jamarion as if she had two heads. "I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"I said would you like to go and grab lunch?"

"Oh, sure."

She grabbed her purse, gun, badge, and her coat. They both walked out at the same time. Jamarion makes a comment in the elevator. "I hope you don't do small talk." She grinned and they glanced at each other. The car ride was silent except for the radio playing. Olivia's eyes bucked when they pulled up to the diner. It was the same her and Nick used to go to.

"I heard this place has the best sandwiches!" Jamarion exclaimed.

She gave her a sloppy half-smile and got out of the car. They walked in and she let Olivia pick with booth they would sit in. "Olivia, what kind of sandwich do you want?"

"You can just get me a Panini but on rye bread." To be honest she wasn't actually hungry. She hasn't been able to eat right after Nick left. Hell, she hasn't even been able to sleep right. "Oh, and Nic- Never mind."

"OK" 'What? Did she just call me Nick?'

**But I go out and I sit at a table set for two**

**And finally I'm forced to face the truth**

**No matter what I say I'm not over you**

They sit there waiting on the sandwiches to be ready. To break the ice Jamarion was going to say something but her phone ring.

"Hello? Nick, what's wrong?"

As soon as she heard Nick her head snapped up and she watched intently

"Baby, what's wrong? Ok. Look in the kitchen by the stove. They are in the second drawer. Ok. Bye. I love you too. Bye"

'I Love You? Could he have moved on that fast?'

"Nick is my son." She said as if she can see Olivia's mind turning. She let out a breath that she didn't know she was holding.

"How old is he?"

"He's 12, let's just say he wasn't planned. Not that I was promiscuous at 16 or anything. He just wasn't planned."

"You were assaulted?"

"Yeah, my family and I went on a trip to Mexico. Who knew that there are sexual predators everywhere? So what about you?"

"What about me?"

"Anything, ever been engaged, ever been married, any children, the reason you're at svu, ever been seriously hurt, ever been brokenhearted, anything?"

Olivia almost missed the last part.

"I have been engaged, never married, no children yet, the baby is still being processed through ACS. Umm, the reason I am at SVU is that I am a product of rape, and my mother couldn't stand to look at me so she drank, got drunk, got abusive, got hungover. And I have been told that I have a thing with the victims."

Both women realized that Olivia skipped the last two questions. Jamarion was about to call her out on that but Olivia's phone rang.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Nick just got home from his job in the Narcotics unit. He has worked a 36 hour shift, and is ready to sleep for a whole week. Then Zara calls.

"Hi daddy!" She sounds overjoyed

"Hey baby, how are you?"

"I'm good, guess what? Mommy said I could come down there for my birthday!" She basically screamed into the phone.

"That is amazing. Do you want to throw a party for your birthday?"

"Yeah, can Fin, Amanda, Don, and Liv come?"

'Oh, shit' "Uh, yeah. How about when you get here we will ask them. Ok?"

"Ok. I love you daddy!"

"I love you too baby. Bye"

"Bye."

'I am so pathetic. I have to use my daughter as a confrontation method. I literately just had a dream, a very hot dream, about _HER_. What am I supposed to do? Never in million years would I think that she could do something like this to me, but I still love her. No matter what I do, no matter what she says, no matter what happens, I will always love her, and I don't know why. I thought that being away from her will help me feel better, help me feel like the old me; but I'm nowhere near it.'

**Damn, Damn girl, you do it well**

**And I thought you were innocent**

**Took this heart and put it through hell**

**I, I'm a boomerang, it doesn't matter how you throw me**

**I turn around and I'm back in the game**

**Even better than the old me**

**But I'm not even close without you**

The next day 2:42 p.m.

Nick and Zara arrived at the precinct and got in the elevators. Instead of there being butterflies in his stomach, they were more like bats. Zara noticed the nervousness and anxiety in her father.

"Daddy what's wrong?"

"Nothing… It's just that daddy hasn't been here in a while."

"Oh."

The elevator dinged and they started their way down the hallway. Zara was the first to walk in bullpen.

"LIV!" Her shrieks alerted all of the detectives. Zara jumped up into Olivia's arms and hugged her tightly, well as tight as her little arms would. Fin, Amanda, and Jamarion were the only ones who noticed Nick walk in.

"Hey sweetie, what are you doing here?"

"I wanted you, Fin, 'Manda, and Don to come to my birthday party."

"Well where is your da-" she looked up and her eyes met with Nick's. After an awkward moment passed, Zara started begging her to come, and pleading with Fin and Amanda.

"Daddy, can I go and ask Don?"

"Yeah, I think he would be surprised if he saw you." Little Zara as fast as she could and knocked on the captain's door.

"Hey, Nick can I speak to you"

"Uh, yeah" 'Oh, shit. What am I getting into?' He thought as he scratched his head.

They walked upstairs and went to the cribs. Olivia closed the door after Nick stepped in. There was a moment of silence between the two. She knew that Nick was dumbfounded of why she wanted to talk to him.

"Nick, I just wanted to talk to you to get closure, and I know that we both need it so hear me out." He simply nodded. "I know that if I had a chance to go back in time and change some of the things that happened. I don't regret sleeping with you though. I would do anything to mend our broken hearts but I can't keep living saying 'what if'. I do not want to cut you out of my life. So can we agree that it is best to remain friends and to keep in touch; if that is ok with you?"

Nick knew that there is a back story to her little speech. She didn't want him to just disappear out of her life. She wanted to continue some sort of relationship. But he hopes that, that is all she wants because he can't handle any more heartbreak.

**And if I had a chance to renew**

**You know there isn't a thing I wouldn't do**

**I could get back on the right track**

**But only if you'd be convinced**

**So until then… **


	4. Words I couldn't say pt 1

Stay with me – Words I couldn't Say- Chapter four

Words I couldn't Say –Rascal Flatts

I love that you all are in tune with my story, so I shall continue it.

Thank for the reviews!

I do not own the main characters. The male animal genitalia Dick Wolf does.

"_So can we agree that it is best to keep in touch; if that is ok with you?"_

_Nick knew that there is a back story to her little speech. She didn't want him to just disappear out of her life. She wanted to continue some sort of relationship. But he hopes that, that is all she wants because he can't handle any more heartbreak._

_**And if I had a chance to renew**_

_**You know there isn't a thing I wouldn't do**_

_**I could get back on the right track**_

_**But only if you'd be convinced**_

_**So until then…**_

CONTINUE…

* * *

Three Months Later – Home of Detective Benson

Olivia is in her apartment lying on her couch with a bourbon bottle in her hands. She hasn't opened it yet. The void that is left in her heart after she pushed Nick away was almost unbearable. She already finished off the rest of her tequila. Her feeling of emptiness is soon filled with guilt after she thinks about the things she said to Nick.

'I don't know why you won't accept that we had an amazing one-night-stand and that is all it will ever be.'

'The first time was a mistake'

'It shouldn't have happened'

'I think it would be best if we forget it and move on with our lives'

The truth of all this is that Nick said he loved her, and truly meant it. She wasn't sure if she loved him because her heart and her brain were constantly fighting over that word. And she is getting mixed signals. Knowing that she likes him but the feelings that she is having is telling her that she loves him. Nick tried calling her a few times but she never had the courage to answer. She just sits and watches it ring not knowing what to do.

**What do I do now that you're gone?**

**No backup plan no second chance**

**And no one else to blame**

Work isn't making the situation better. Today they uncovered a prostitution ring and in the midst of it, one of her old co-workers showed up- the one that she slept with. Come to find out he is undercover. It is clear to her and Cassidy that they both had some sort of feeling towards each other. They went out to dinner yesterday, and it was enjoyable but her mind wasn't really with him. All she thought about was when she slept with Nick.

But tonight the alcohol just wasn't cutting it for her. She needed some other type of stress relief. Who better to call than Brian? She picks up her phone, unlocks it, and scrolls through her contacts until she finds his name and picture. She touches it and her phone starts to ring.

"Cassidy"

"Hey Bri"

"Hey" you can hear his excitement through his phone.

"Would you like to come over?"

"Uh, Yeah I'll be there"

"Ok, I'll see you when you get here."

"Yeah, I lo- , I'll be there. Bye" He almost said I love you, and he quickly changed his mind. Not wanting to upset her.

"Bye."

When Brian came he brought wine. He fixed two glasses, and filled them close to the top with the deep purple liquid. Olivia sat on the couch waiting on him. She was wearing a dark purple shirt with a deep v-cut that showed an ample amount of cleavage. She had on a gray skirt that stopped right above her knee and it hugged her figure in all the right places, and she also had on dark purple suede stilettos to match her shirt.

Brian walked over and handed her, her glass and sat down next to her. "You look amazing Liv"

"Bri that is like the tenth time you told me that since you got here." She chuckled

"Well, I do love seeing you in purple." He grinned

"Well, I like seeing you naked" She smiled seductively and took a sip of her wine. He huskily groaned, and put his glass on the table. He put his hand on her thigh and started to slowly rub it. "What else do you like me doing?" His hand moved higher on her thigh and he heard her breath hitch. She put her glass down and leaned over to whisper in his ear and said "I love it when you let me ride you." And she straddled him the best she could with her skirt on. "Oh, do you now?" He leaned forward to capture her lips in a heated kiss.

He ran his fingers through her hair while his other hand ran over the swell of her breast, and he gently squeezed. She moaned into his mouth, and the vibrations went straight to his groin and he bucked into her. He moved his hands to grip her hip, and he started to kiss down the column of her neck, nibbling her sensitive spot right below her ear. He bunched up her skirt to her waist.

"Oh my god Liv!" He said in a breathy moan when he realized that she didn't have on any panties; she lightly chuckled.

With one arm wrapped around her waist and fistful of her beautiful brown hair, he crashed his lips onto hers. He probed his tongue on her bottom lip begging for entry. Liv slightly parted her lips to breathe and He took his chance. He ran his tongue along her teeth deepening the kiss while gently pulling her hair.

Brian maneuvered to where he was slowly lowering her onto the couch. He broke the kiss and once again started to kiss down her neck; she was still panting for oxygen. Then he moved back to her lips that were still kiss-swollen from their last encounter.

Olivia started to work on unbuttoning his jeans. Once his jeans were handled, she started on his button-down shirt. She ended up ripping his shirt off, sending buttons flying everywhere, after getting frustrated. Never once did she notice that her shirt was already under her shoulders, Brian was just waiting on her to lift her arms. She pushed off his shirt then lifted her arms.

A few moments later, Olivia is pushed up against the arm of the couch with Brian's face in between her legs. She lets out a strangled moan when her slowly licked up and down her slick slit. Then he started sucking on her clit. She started bucking involuntarily, and let a blood-boiling shriek when he stuck his tongue and his fingers into her tight heat. Every time he thrust his fingers in her, her moans got a little bit higher in pitch; they both knew she was close.

"Ah! I- I'm com-coming!" she stuttered.

He started moving his tongue faster as he curled his fingers to hit her delicate g-spot. After A few seconds she came hard and screamed "NICK!"

Brian abruptly stopped and looked at her with anger and confusion laced in the contours of his face. "What did you say?" She didn't answer because she was still coming down from her mind numbing orgasm. "WHAT DID YOU SAY?" He screamed. Her head snapped up because she didn't know why he was mad; she didn't know she screamed out someone else's name. "What are you talking about?"

"Don't play fucking stupid. You are over here screaming some other fucker's name while I'm making you come!" Brian stands. "How long have you been fucking him? What, after I leave you call him so he can fuck you brains out?" Olivia hasn't said anything; she just stood and walked over to the other side of the room. "So, you are just going ignore the question?"

He walks closer to her and screams "HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN FUCKING HIM?" He does the unexpected. He pulls his arm back and he slaps her. Olivia doubled over and almost fell to the ground. As soon as it happened, regret, remorse, and fear laced his voice as he apologized. She reached under her living room side table and grabbed her gun. She aimed it at him, while blood was oozing from her split lip and her busted nose. "Get out." She said eerily. He tried apologizing once more. She took the safety off of her gun. "I SAID GET OUT!"

Brian stumbled around as he tried to quickly gather his clothes. The last thing he was looking for was his shoe; Olivia had it in her hand behind her back.

"Liv, I can't find my shoe."

She took the shoe from behind her, aimed, and threw it at his head. He wasn't expecting the throw so it hit him in the side of his head.

"OUCH!"

"That's what you get you asshole." She sneered.

He picked up his shoe and walked out of her apartment. He walked down the hallway and he heard the elevator doors open. Nick walked out. The anger and rage that flowed through Brian's veins were evident now that his face was red.

"Oh so she called you already? You couldn't even wait until I left the fucking building?"

"What are you talking about? Who called me?" Nick was extremely confused he didn't know why Brian was up here.

"Don't fucking play games."

"Look Brian, I don't know what kind of shit you are on, but you need to get it handled. I don't know _what_ you're talking about. I don't know _who_ you're talking about, and I'm not one of your buddies, so you can change the way you are talking to me or _I_ will. So, I suggest you get your ass on that elevator and leave me the hell alone." They walked past each other, Brian got on the elevator, and Nick stopped at Olivia's door. He knocked.

"DIDN'T I TELL YOU TO LEAVE?" She screamed through the door.

"No." He answered through the door. He had a smug grin on his face. Next thing he knew the door swung open and his stomach dropped three floors. He saw her busted lip, her bloodied nose, and the bruise that was forming on the side of her face. He stood watching her with his mouth ajar.

"Nick." This was the only words she could form before she started crying.

It seems that hours have passed until she had stopped crying. They had already moved into her apartment and He was sitting on the couch with Liv's head in his lap.

**There's a rain that will never stop fallin'**

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**Thanks for reading, sorry I haven't updated in a minute, but my birthday passed and my family and I went out of the country so, I apologized for the delayed update and please review.**


	5. Words I couldn't say pt 2

Stay With Me – Words I couldn't Say pt.2 – Chapter 5

Words I couldn't say- Rascal Flatts

Sorry for _le delay, _but I should be posting regs. now. {Ohh! I forgot to tell you that Nick wasn't there when the whole 'Munch saw the Liv and Cassidy, tai food thing'}

Please review

DISCLAIMER: I do not own the main characters. The male animal genitalia Dick Wolf does.

_It seems hours have passed until she had stopped crying. They had already moved into her apartment and he was sitting on the couch with Liv's head in his lap._

_**There's a rain that will never stop fallin' **_

**LINE BREAK HERE**

Nick tried to soothe her by stroking her hair, which only calmed her body-quaking sobs by a fraction. He also tried to calm both of their nerves by whispering sweet nothings to her. 'It's okay Liv. I'm here for you, whenever you need me; just calm down Liv.' He only stopped when he thought he heard her say something.

"I'm sorry" she whispered more to herself than to Nick.

"For what Liv, you didn't do anything wrong?"

"I did. I pushed you away, I said very hurtful things and I'm sorry." She ended sniffling at the end.

"Liv, you shouldn't be sorry. I pushed you too far and I should have known-" he was cut off.

"Known what, that I would be a complete bitch to you; that I would even _attempt _to move on knowing how hurt you were. Why can you just accept my apology and be done with it?" she stood up and started to walk toward her room.

Nick could see it from a mile away, she had her cement in one hand and her bricks in the other; She was building her wall back up. Nick knew that she was going to do that, and he was trying very hard to avoid it. He should have just told her why he was coming over here in the first place. He actually came to apologize to her for being such an ass. He just couldn't bring himself to add more stress to her plate. He decided that he would wait until she calmed down, then he would try squeeze through the crevices of her wall.

**There's a wall I tried to take down**

**What I should have said just wouldn't pass my lips**

**So I held back and now we've come to this**

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Ten minutes later, she heard him slowly walk up to her bedroom door. She instantly wanted to scream and yell at him to leave her the fuck alone, but on the other side she wanted him to hold her all night and tell her everything was going to be alright. Her thoughts were running a mile a minute about the incident between her and Brian. Did she want to press charges? Did she want him to pay for her injuries? Or did she just want him out of her life forever? Her thoughts were broken when she heard Nick ask something, but she didn't quite catch it.

"What?"

"I said do you want to talk about it?" There was an awkward moment of silence. "Talk about Brian," he tried. She seemed to perk up at his suggestions knowing that she just wanted to get it off her chest. "and maybe about work and other things." He was still standing in the door way, and she had now sat up just watching him; trying to see if he was going to move.

"You could sit down if you want." She told him; more like pleaded. He silently walked over and sat on the other side of her bed, with his back on the headboard. He turned his head to glance at her, but saw her looking into a blank space, zoned out.

"Liv"

"Huh?"

"Are you going to tell me about Brian?"

"Will you promise me that your ego doesn't get any bigger?" she asked with all seriousness.

"Uhh, yeah, I promise." He was very confused

"Okay" she took a deep breath and paused for a minute. "We were on the couch… and things kinda got heated." She stopped glanced at him then turned her head back to the wall. "The next thing I know that happens is his… his head was in between my legs." She dropped her gaze to her lap and blushed. "Then I called out your name." She basically mumbled the last part and said it so fast that he didn't hear it.

"You what?" he looked at her with a quirked eyebrow, but lucky for him she didn't see him.

"I called out you name, ok?" She said frustratedly. Nick fought hard to contain his laughter, and to try to minimize his ego. But it wasn't working. Liv glanced over and saw his face turn beet red because he was containing his laughter. Nick took a second to wallow in his pride and take deep breaths to calm down.

"What happened next?"

"He started yelling insane things like, 'How long have I been fucking you' and how you were my booty-call when he left. When he started getting louder I moved to the other side of the room; he just followed me to that side. He got in my face and started to talk nonsense again; I honestly didn't think that he would do it. But he pulled his arm back and slapped me, and I can say I have been hit harder." She ended with a smirk. She waited a brief moment until she continued. "I then pulled by gun from under the side table and told him to leave a few times cause he kept trying to apologize. He was getting dressed and I saw his shoe by my foot so I grabbed it and hid it behind my back. When he finally asked for it… uh, I sort of threw it at his head." She dropped her gaze to her lap embarrassed by her pettiness.

Honestly Nick stopped fully listening after she told him that he hit her. He felt like he could literately punch a hole through his face. His schedule for tomorrow was already set; he was willingly going to IAB.

"Nick, I don't want to press charges." The way his head snapped up looked like it hurt.

"Why?" He asked thinking of many more ways to beat the living shit out of Brian.

"Because I do not want to see him ever again. This time I actually want him to just disappear from my life like nothing happened." She added with a little bitterness at the end.

The tension in the room became awkward. Nick obviously wanted to continue on the topic but Olivia didn't seem up to it. So Nick decided that drastic times call for drastic measures.

_Small talk._

"So, um Liv how's work?" he tried, knowing she didn't do small talk.

"Surprisingly well, your replacement is nice, she's a good cop. Um, she kind of scared me though."

"How?"

"Someone called her phone while we were at lunch, and the person's name was Nick. I don't know why my first thought was you. I guess you were just on my mind at the time. His full name is Nycholas actually. Her name is Jamarion _Cragen." _She added more emphasis on her last name.

"Cragen? Is she and the captain related?"

"No, well not that I know of."

That seemed to be the end of that conversation because he kept thinking about strangling a certain someone. He turned his body facing her and stared intently. Liv pretended not to realize it but he was irritating the hell out of her.

"You know if you blink a few times you might be able to see it more clearly." She said with her sarcasm and a million dollar grin.

"I'm afraid that if I blink it will go away." He said sincerely. She tried very hard to keep her unshed tears unshed as she gnawed at her lower lip. She didn't respond and necessarily she didn't have too.

"Liv, I miss you."

"Don't say that, you don't mean it." She weakly argued.

"I do mean it. Why do you think I was coming over here in the first place?"

"According to Brian I called you." She chuckled to herself.

"Liv, I'm serious." He slowly inched his way closer to her. Which went unnoticed by her.

"Liv, I miss you, I love you, and I want you more than anything in life. I can't keep running from this." He said lowering his voice knowing that she loved it when he talked to her like that. She looked deep into his eyes as if she were trying to see his soul.

"Nick, I feel the same way I'm just scared."

"I know that you are scared. I know that you're because you think that I will let you sink waist deep in your feelings and leave you there." He paused and gently used his fingers to lift her head so he could look into her eyes. "But, no matter what I'm not going anywhere. No matter how many times you try to force me out of your life, I won't; I can't. All I can say is that meeting you was fate, becoming your friend and your partner was a choice, but falling in love with you I had no control over."

Olivia sat and stared intently, while her mind ran a mile a minute. She felt like pouring her heart out and basically sewing it onto her sleeve. But her mind was a dangerous thing. It told her things that in her heart she knew weren't true. Her mind daily flicked off her heart and told it to grow a pair. But this very moment in time her mind had nothing to say _against _this. It repeatedly said 'Do it before I change my mind'. Just for clarification she still should ask this one question.

"Do you really want me and my baggage?" She asked shyly. Nick simply grinned as he was slightly offended that she didn't believe him.

"Liv. Liv, listen to me and listen well. I want you; all of your flaws, mistakes, smiles, giggles, jokes, sarcasm. I really want you." He ended with a small smile. To say the least Olivia was quite speechless. Here she sat with Nick fucking Amaro, listening to him spill his guts, and she didn't have a damn word to say. It's kind of pathetic. She was starting to think that she had philophobia- the fear of love. But she couldn't possibly have philophobia, she had once fallen in love before. Her first real love was a crash and burn. That is probably why she couldn't even respond correctly to Nick because she entirely fucked up in the head. But sitting in silence forcing herself not to cry wasn't helping the situation at all.

**All I can hear in the silence that remains, **

**Are the words I couldn't say.**

"Nick, I I-I," It was clear that she wasn't going to repeat those three word that her once told her so she decided that she would send the message a different way.

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**Please review! also I am currently working on another story so be on the look out! Thanks Again and please review!**


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